I'm In You!

2011-02-02T17:05:00.007+08:00

I met with my Santee today.

She is a 22 year old SMU student in the last year of her business course. While we waited for the bus to take me back, I asked her for advice, and this is what she said:

1. I will waste lots of time on BCME.
2. I should get a boyfriend, like, now. (WTF?! This came up from her mentioning that she has a reunion dinner later on and all her relatives will be asking her if she has one)
3. I have to know what I want to do in Uni, because what I do in uni is going to affect what I'm going to do for the rest of my life.
4. I should try a different PDP.

2011-02-01T22:38:00.002+08:00

In an infinite universe, the one thing sentient life cannot afford to have is a sense of proportion.
-Douglas Adams, The Hitch hikers Guide to the Galaxy

Started thinking about the meaning of everything and life and some reddit threads got me going.

Even if I had a huge career and was really well known (close to impossible), or lived a life full of joy, I'd still be damn insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Not even a speck.

What's the point of worrying about things when nothing really matters anymore?

2011-01-31T22:09:00.001+08:00

Recently I've been watching Adventure Time, one of the two TV shows contained in the HDD that SecretSanta gave. It. Is. Awesome.

I can't exactly pinpoint what it is that is so funny, you'll have to watch it for yourself. I found a source that showed more recent episodes. I think I'll watch them when I feel damn stressed. The silliness of Finn and Jake is always so funny.

2011-01-31T21:31:00.002+08:00

Today was orientation, and as usual it was fun. I was damn lag, and only just realized that:
1. All the 1B people are in Keza.

2. Keza and Kaezer sound very much alike, so when the other clan is cheering "Kaezer Kaezer number one!" it sounds like they are cheering for us.

3. Cheering loudly is not so much for the sake of cheering than it is for hyping up the mood. I wonder who discovered that...

4. People are actually quite nice if you talk to them.
What the heck was I thinking?! People are mean to you if you talk to them?! But at least this time I had SOME guts and talked to other people first, something I wish I'd done in TA Orientation.
On a related side note, I noticed this in WOW when I talked to Tu Wen and Somya and Tian Li, they are all very nice people.

5. While most people are friendly, some are not and they know it. It would do you good to stay away from them. (Very, very rare though)

6. Making small talk is OK enough. Carrying on is a big problem.
(Reading some threads on reddit to see if there's anything I can do!)

7. Be nice to everyone and say hi with a bright smile when you see them (and they don't see you), even though they might not reciprocate.

2011-01-29T23:30:00.000+08:00

God, grant me:
the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.

2011-01-29T12:03:00.001+08:00

I got rid of 4 year's worth of Digital Life magazines a while back, I don't miss them at all.

2011-01-28T09:58:00.002+08:00

I know I said no more ambiguous posts, but here goes:
Avoidance is key. I'm gonna avoid you if I can.

(Edit: It seems fitting that the randomly assigned image for this post is a girl covering her eyes.)

2011-01-27T22:48:00.004+08:00

Things I learned from WOW (unofficially)

The "teacher mentors" don't really care. You could be absent for the whole day and say you were at some other place in the school.
Tu Wen can draw really well.
For every bus stop, there is another bus stop on the other side of the road carrying the same buses but in the opposite direction.
On an MRT, standing in a corner is the best kind of standing possible.
If you don't take a reserved seat during rush hour, someone else less deserving than you will.
If you take a reserved seat, give it up when you see an elderly.
Singapore Polytechnic is very cool.
Wireless@SG is FREE. (blew my mind when I realized all those hotspots had free internet OMGWTF)

2011-01-27T21:22:00.003+08:00

While taking the bus home today I was listening to my iPod Touch and Good Girls Go Bad was on, and I realized that when they say "Good girls go baaaaaad" the "bad" sounds more like sheep baaing because they never end. So, good girls turn to sheep huh?

And then Maneater came on, and I thought Nelly Furtado was singing "I'm an anteater..."

Which was really hilarious.

2011-01-27T13:57:00.005+08:00

I thought I would be happy to see the new J1s today, but it turns out I felt oddly jealous of them. The best way I can put this into words is that it feels like they're invading TJC.

It's like, I've been here longer than anyone else, even the J2s but we're the same - J1s. On the other hand, they might think I worked hard to get here, you got in through some simple test.

That's weird isn't it? I hope that feeling will go away soon.

Oh yeah, now that they're here, I betcha the soya bean will go down real quick.

2011-01-25T22:35:00.002+08:00

I just realized that Right Round (Flo Rida) was not referring to pole dancing. It was referring to something much more risque.
I am feeling super hyper right now. I have no idea why, but it feels awesome to be hyper!
I am glad I didn't pon CO today!

2011-01-25T21:14:00.001+08:00

Last year, this time, I was wondering if I should quit CO or not.

I can't quite remember why I decided to stay.

2011-01-25T14:48:00.001+08:00

Reddit is down.
I have nothing to do.

2011-01-24T09:46:00.001+08:00

Realize that people worry about what YOU think of them. Tilt that shit on its head, redditor.
- TJ11240, Link

I started off the day walking with my head up instead of looking at the ground like I normally do.

2011-01-23T22:48:00.001+08:00

2011-01-23T22:36:00.002+08:00

Going shopping for my Santee tomorrow, will deliver present on THURSDAY!

I'm going to go to Parkway Parade, but won't be buying too much.
1. Pack of Fruit Plus Sweets (Grape)
2. Arashi album
3. Something really cool from ameba/Borders.

Budget: $30.

2011-01-22T22:25:00.004+08:00

If you need a reason why comparing yourself to others doesn't work, this is what I realized: You simply cannot compare your entire self to another individual. You can only compare portions of yourself against others, but those portions do not make up the whole person. If they outsmart you in area X, you're probably better than them in area Y. Your life experiences make you who you are, no one else has the exact same set of life experiences. You will have a different perspective on things.
- mjschultz, Link

What if they're better than you in every way?

To my family, but mostly just my mom:

2011-01-22T22:10:00.008+08:00

If I've just come home from a long day in which I have been doing physical activity, and rushing from place to place, your job is very simple: just leave me the hell alone.

I don't feel like indulging your little fantasies (I really do mean fantasies), and neither am I in the mood to pander to your interests.

And don't you dare tell me to let go of the things I've worked so hard for.

But most importantly:
Leave. Me. The. Hell. Alone.

2011-01-22T22:02:00.003+08:00

I think I posted part of this comic a while back. But it's given me a new angle on things.

2011-01-21T20:03:00.001+08:00

Went to Singapore Poly again today. It's the third last lesson - the third last time I have to stand on the MRT for an hour! Yay!

The teacher showed us this animation:

2011-01-21T10:39:00.001+08:00

2004 was seven years ago.

I feel old. The new TA1s look so young, fresh out of sec 2. The TA2s look more mature this year. Funny how they change.

2011-01-21T00:42:00.000+08:00

My brother came home today!! :) Okay, so it was only two days, but still.

Guess what he did? He didn't change his underwear for two days, because "I couldn't find the underwear in the bag". Reminds me of the time he didn't shower for the three day camp because he was too lazy to take the soap out.

Oddly enough, I really do miss my brother, even though it's only been two days.

2011-01-19T21:49:00.004+08:00

My brother's away at camp for today and tomorrow. I kind of miss all the chattering. At any point of time when I'm not in my room at home, either my mom or brother is talking to me.

Tonight it was just silence.

2011-01-18T21:40:00.004+08:00

I got rematched with my Santee today!

I was reading her Reddit comments and twitter feed. Just in case she searches for her username, I put it in an image.

I am super excited about this!

2011-01-17T13:59:00.005+08:00

I spent six hours. On a ten second animation.
Damnit.

2011-01-15T21:19:00.008+08:00

Long post ahead.

Today was somewhat sucky because I had to go for a Mazarin meeting.

I do not have pleasant memories of SHINES Outdoor. For a name that's supposed to sound cheerful, it rings up memories of sweaty panicky afternoons and aching bodies. Also, today's the only day in the week I can sleep in, so you can imagine my crankiness at having to wake up in the morning.

Throughout the meeting, I kept stifling my yawns, and weirdly enough, only my right eye teared up from the yawning.

After the meeting, I walked to the MRT with Linying and Vikhash. I think we were talking about scholarships and WOW attachments. When we were on the train, the topic shifted to OBS - both Linying and Vikhash were there, but not me - and then I said something about how weird it was that girls were sleeping without their shirts, only their bras and pants.

And then after a few more sentences (something about another side of Vikhash) Vikhash said something like "Yeah, you do know too much" and kept really quiet for the remainder of the ride. This is Vikhash we're talking about.

I've been thinking about the whole Faith-Knows-Secrets thing, and while I've kept in mind that most of the time people are just kidding, there is always some degree of truth to these kind of things. You know, like how old wives' tales are so popular because they were alterations of what used to be a truth.

I came to the conclusion that it's not so much that I know too much, as much as it's that I share too little. For someone who is usually listening on to people's conversations, I rarely - if ever - contribute as much as they do, and I realized that makes people uncomfortable. It's like, hey, you heard something personal about me, it's your turn now.

Imagine talking about things that only people in your circle of friends knew. And then this stranger - quiet, seemingly unassuming - comes in and listens, but never says a word. Some are OK with it, but others may think I have some sort of malicious intent.

The reason why I share very little is because I take a very, very long time to get comfortable around people. Think about Orientation Camp. Everyone's in that awkward state of not knowing what to do, or just sticking around with familiar faces. Most people get over that awkward state in a few days. But me - it takes a lot of effort and time to break through that barrier.

I never feel comfortable enough around people to talk to them about personal stuff, right to their face. It's easy to type about personal stuff on a blog. But telling them to someone, to see their reaction right after, it's hard.

Most people, after a few days or hours of being around awkward quiet me, just give up and conclude I'm always going to be like that.

I suppose this is as much as I'm going to bother about this, because I've come to my own conclusion about friends and people in general quite a while back, and it's that in life, all you need are a few close friends, and I've found them.

2011-01-15T19:38:00.002+08:00

I am so glad I don't have to take Chinese anymore.

Every episode of Fringe

2011-01-15T18:34:00.007+08:00

1. Victim contracts a mysterious but potent supervirus unknowingly. Infects entire restaurant/airplane, and occupants die a horrendous death. Usually involving body fluids splattered all over the restaurant/airplane.

ROLL OPENING

2. Broyles: Olivia, round up the others and meet me at (the site of the deaths).

3. Olivia, Walter and his son arrive at the site of the deaths.

4. Walter brings back the body of the original victim to the lab, without wearing face masks or anything, even though virus was spread airborne.

5. Walter: I have three thoughts: 1), something useful, 2), something useful.
Olivia: What's your last thought?
Walter: What?
Olivia: You said you had three thoughts.
Walter: Oh yes. [Insert something irrelevant like I need to pee or Chocolate cake.]
Walter's son: Ladies and gentleman, my father. (sarcastic tone)

6. Virus spreads somehow, affecting many people.

7. Walter develops antibiotics and manages to kill off the virus.

8. Broyles: Good job Olivia, you should give yourself more credit. But your not giving yourself credit is what makes you so successful.

ROLL END CREDITS

2011-01-14T22:13:00.001+08:00

Lesson of the day: Never let hand sanitizer go onto any skin that has been peeled away, or on cuts. Because it will sting.

2011-01-14T21:13:00.001+08:00

We were supposed to pass up an animation of a person giving someone else a present and the present is originally hidden behind the giver's back.

I cheated.

I couldn't see how the arm and the gift was supposed to turn out, so I took a video of myself holding a tissue box behind my back and then bringing the tissue box to the front. Then I just traced it and submitted it.

I take back what I said about The Tab Pro. It's actually quite useful. Friday's lesson was about linking parts of a body together, so that animating becomes a whole lot easier. I also learnt that the program does have some kind of Motion Tween, very similar to the one in Flash.

2011-01-14T00:05:00.001+08:00

In an alternate reality, Faith Chia has taken the O Levels.

I wonder what I'd have scored and if I would even make it to TJC if I did take the O levels.

2011-01-13T20:43:00.004+08:00

Sometimes, when I'm in a crowded room and thinking something... let's just say wrong, I suddenly wonder if there are mind readers in the same room. And then I start mentally apologizing for whatever it is that I'm thinking.

"Hey, I know you're there. Sorry you had to listen to that."

At which point I realize that that is completely ridiculous because only God knows my thoughts and there are no such things as mind readers.

Am I going insane? (Or watched too many episodes of Heroes, maybe?)

2011-01-11T21:34:00.004+08:00

I spent the better part of the morning and some of the afternoon watching Fringe and HIMYM. And then the open house performance.

I got lost halfway and then thought I knew where it was... but it turns out I was wrong. Hongwen said it was obvious that I was lost. She was standing behind me and playing the bass and could still tell I was lost.

Damn.

Now I feel bad because Nobody's supposed to be a really simple song but I couldn't even play it right and other people have to pick up my slack.

2011-01-11T14:24:00.000+08:00

Open house just started and I have absolutely nothing to do but sit and wait. I don't even know where the CO booth is. It's supposed to be under LT1 according to fliers, but I thought they were going to use the old booth spot at the Arts Hub. Anyway. I am really bored right now.

2011-01-11T09:30:00.001+08:00

All done for the day.

And it's only 9:30am.

It's not even a work attachment. It's just a course for two days of the week and slack the remaining days.

2011-01-10T16:58:00.001+08:00

I PASSED CHINESE!!

I promised my family I'd buy them dinner if I passed. But now that I think of it I'm not the one paying. My dad pays me my allowance which I'll use to buy dinner so it's not really my money now is it?

2011-01-10T13:36:00.001+08:00

I just finished lunch and am typing this from my iPod touch in the canteen.

In 24 minutes' time I will know if I am going to waste six hours a week studying Chinese or not.

I am so scared I am actually contemplating not opening it until school opens.

2011-01-09T21:48:00.001+08:00

I don't care if I don't get an A. Or a B. Or even a C grade. I just want to pass. Pleasepleaseplease let me get a D7 and above.

If it were completely random, I'd have a slightly higher chance of passing than failing.

2011-01-08T16:34:00.002+08:00

I had a great time.

2011-01-08T16:33:00.000+08:00

Say yay for the Jumping Purple Tofu!

2011-01-06T09:26:00.003+08:00

Fast!

I took one and a half hours to make this in The Tab Pro, which is hundreds of times more tedious to use than Flash.

Probably would've taken 10 minutes in Flash if I knew how to use the Motion Guide.

I still have no idea who my Santee is. :(

2011-01-04T22:28:00.000+08:00

I miss sleeping at 4am and waking up at 12pm.

2011-01-04T16:19:00.002+08:00

I realized something:

Now that I have a work attachment, I can go home on my own. Which means that if I want to send a huge package out, I can. I can go shopping after work and put it all in a package and ship it off and my parents can't say anything 'cause they wouldn't know.

Awesome.

2011-01-04T16:10:00.004+08:00

After stalking my Santa, and reading lots of posts in /r/SecretSanta, I decided that instead of sending a gift to my Santa, I should sign up for a rematching instead. That way, people who got shafted the first time can get a great gift.

Also, I am going to sign up for Arbitrary Day, aka SummerSanta! :)

Nevertheless, I found out a lot of stuff about my Santa:

Studies Computer Science at Worchester Polytechnic Institute (but will graduate in Spring this year. Spring's in March-half of June)
Skilled in Java, C, C#. Knows how to write JUnit & NUnit tests, Perl and PHP
Wants to go to grad school to get a PhD/MS in Computer Science
Loves Minecraft (a LOT.)
SecretSanta code: be56ef74920edc919b21e9fac67fd2e61e296089
Not an expert on Haitian history, or SEO
Was really enthusiastic about stuffing the stocking with candy
Loves musicals, hates Glee
Uses Linux (also uses Windows 7, 32 bit)
Is straight
Only has a 2 MegaPixel cameraphone
Has twin 9 year old brothers who constantly compete against each other
Has two sisters (big family!)
Wants graphic cards
Does not have a scarf

2011-01-04T11:49:00.000+08:00

So bored that I wrote that out instead of just typing it.

2011-01-04T11:32:00.004+08:00

Myth #16: If You're Unsure of Your Answer When Taking a Test, It's Best to Stick with Your Initial Hunch

I thought that was a myth too. If you're unsure of all the answers, mathematically speaking, you're much more likely to choose a wrong answer (75%) than a right one (25%) so your initial hunch won't matter.

But then during the Mid Year Exams, I guessed all the multiple choice answers in Chinese, and then got them right, so I'm a bit divided on this one.

The book explored other myths like how people can recover "hidden" memories with the help of hypnosis, how Mozart music increases the intelligence of fetuses (fetusii?) and whether or not memory is written into our brains with indelible ink.

The answers are more practical: No, people can't recover hidden memories. Rather, most of these "recovered" memories are planted there because of leading questions that cause the patient to imagine things that didn't really happen.

Mozart music doesn't increase the intelligence of babies (oh, it took scientists to figure out this one?), it only improved the performance of college students performing a simple task about 10 minutes after they heard it, and even then the performance increase could have been due to increased arousal. Arousal as in more wide awake.

Memories aren't perfect. They can be changed. After days or years we remember things differently. And even adults can be led to believe that certain events during childhood, which never happened, did happen to them.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

On a side note, I feel kind of guilty that I got all these awesome presents. I'm thinking of something.

2011-01-04T11:17:00.003+08:00

2D Digital Animation is great because we only have to go to SP two days out of five and stay in school for the rest of the time with our "teacher mentors".
I think this month will be relatively free compared to when school starts so I'm going to start revising and plan for birthday presents!
Also, I am seeing if I can afford to get another present... for someone. Except I'm not sure about the rates and the distance issue.
I think blogging in points makes it easy to see what I'm thinking.

2011-01-04T00:12:00.003+08:00

The work attachment starts tomorrow. If you want to be technical, okay it starts today. I hope the hours are short(er).
I had a weird dream last night. I dreamt I got a D on the Chinese O Levels and then I started panicking. I spent the rest of my dream panicking.
I read some of my posts when I was in Sec One and I realized I was a really big _______. (If only Blogger allows robots.txt in the root directory T_T... Well, I could delete my posts, but then there would be no scarring reminder of how weird I was back then, so I'm just going to leave it.)
There's really nothing much going on these few days.

This post is so short I am considering starting a twitter account.

EDIT: I tried and the new twitter is giving me a blank page.

2011-01-01T19:38:00.001+08:00

2 more days till school starts.
5 more days till prom.
8 more days till O level results come out.
9 more days till Open House.
43 more days till my brother's birthday. (And I know this because he's been reminding everyone.)

My brother really wants this book:

He's been telling me everytime we step into Popular or Borders or MPH.

Well, since he wants it so much, here's what I'm going to do:
1. Get a huge dictionary.
2. Carve book sized hole in said dictionary.
3. Wrap book with Twilight Eclipse *shudder* cover.
4. Put book inside book sized hole in dictionary.
5. Wrap dictionary with Dora the Explorer wrapping paper.
6. ???
7. See his expression on his birthday!

My mom said that might be a tad too cruel, but I think it's OK. Only problem being that the wrapping may be worth more than the book itself.

2011-01-01T00:00:00.000+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I can't believe this day would come. I remember the time when I was a weeny sec one, wondering what secondary school would be like and then JC, and it's actually here. I am a J1 student. Voila.

2010-12-31T13:29:00.004+08:00

I feel kind of dumb right now...

1. I spent quite awhile trying to get the round circle part of the Candy Bomb to come out, only to find out that it's the ignition part you're suppose to unscrew.
On the plus side, I finally figured out how to eat the bomb candy thing!

2. I ate some of the chewing gum. Well, at least I didn't get poisoned/die. And I couldn't make a bubble :( Ah well, at least I know what chewing gum tastes like.

3. The hard drive that I got included 1 year's subscription to Wuala, an online storage service that is very much like Dropbox. Plus the one year's subscription is for 10 GB. So I guess I can store tons of stuff on it now! :)

4. I just realized... portable hard disk drives cannot be connected to the computer via a port hub extension, because they need power too, and port hub extensions only allow for data transfer and not power.

Which is bad news because my laptop only has 3 USB ports, and I relied on two port hub extensions to connect all my devices.

Port hub #1: 4-Port hub extension, which links to another 4-Port hub extension.
Port hub #2: iPod Touch.
Port hub #3: Santa's 500GB HDD or the 640GB HDD I got this Christmas (yay for storage!)

Best. Christmas. EVER.

2010-12-30T23:23:00.013+08:00

So I got my SecretSanta's gift today.

Or should I say, I got ALL EIGHT of my gifts today. Eight presents. Is my Santa awesome or what?

Super excited about present! And that's an A4 sized paper on the top!
Is this package HUGE or what?

Awesome, I got a Christmas stocking :)

I see an orangered...

(When you get a message in reddit, the mail icon next to your username turns orangey-red, hence "orangered" is the nickname for new mail.)

My Santa explained how to do an integration problem I was stuck with.
I am very impressed at the degree of stalking this Santa went to.

What I Got:

1. 50 Myths of Popular Psychology (I've been eyeing this book for a long time...)
2. 500GB LaCie hard disk that contained MUSIC AND TV SHOWS ON IT (YAY! Just my favorite things!)
3. Peppermint Chocolate
4. Air horn
5. Candy powder/Bomb thing
6. Bubble Gum (!!! :D)
7. Mr Gonzo's Wazoo Juice
8. Carpenter's Christmas Music
9. Christmas Stocking

---------------------------------------------------------

#1, 50 Great Myths of Popular Psychology:

I am going to read this right after I post this!

---------------------------------------------------------

#2, A 500GB portable hard disk drive
(I am speechless at this one. SecretSanta, whoever you are, this is incredibly generous.)

Opening the drive up:

Hmm, I wonder what could possibly be in a drive called "Bacon"...

Music and TV Shows. Awesome.

---------------------------------------------------------

#3, Peppermint Chocolate
These were really tasty and I realized that this was making the whole package smell really good because the smell leaked out to the box.
Yum.

---------------------------------------------------------

#4, Air Horn
It's really loud. And I opened this at night, so I hope I didn't wake any neighbors up.

---------------------------------------------------------

#5, Candy Powdered Bomb Shaped thing.
I had no idea how to open it. But it looks super cute.

---------------------------------------------------------

#6, BUBBLE GUM.

I tried eating one but I couldn't blow a bubble :(
Oh and sneaky Santa DIDN'T declare this on the Customs form! Clever!

---------------------------------------------------------

#7, Mr Gonzo's Wazoo Juice. (Pun unintended...)

It tastes great on meats... *Giggle*
Anyway, I'm going to try it tomorrow!

---------------------------------------------------------

#8, Carpenter's Christmas Music
Santa grew up listening to this and it's not Christmas without it.
My mom loved this CD!

---------------------------------------------------------

I can't believe the presents cost that much. I think they cost even more than what's declared! Especially the 500GB Hard Disk Drive and the Book already cost more than what's listed.
Plus the shipping fee is outrageous.

---------------------------------------------------------

Hey SecretSanta,
You made my Christmas amazing. I love all the presents I got! The rest of what I wanna say is already in the post on redditgifts.
I hope you had an equally awesome Christmas!
Faith
PS As I said in the redditgifts post: I can't track you down! Please PM me your reddit username.

2010-12-30T21:14:00.001+08:00

So the postman came while I was out for dinner...

AAAAAAHHHHH OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG I am so excited.

I called the number on the notice the postman left and the parcel's coming in 20 minutes!

Wish me luck!

2010-12-30T14:45:00.002+08:00

Hey, you.

You've been working really hard but you can't see any results. Honestly sometimes I think that you're super frustrated but you continue anyway. And I think it's mostly my fault.

Please don't give up.

2010-12-29T22:19:00.001+08:00

2010-12-27T21:07:00.002+08:00

I tried teaching my brother how to play the right hand version of Fur Elise.

It went fairly well.

In the end, he managed to get through 8 bars. The bad part was that he disregarded all the fingerings and didn't learn what the notes were. He used both hands to play the right hand side. I tried insisting but then let him have his way.

It kind of reminded me of how I'm playing the cello right now: I don't refer to the notes by their letters, but by the numbers, I don't play lower on the string when it needs to be done, I don't slide on the string, either.

After teaching my brother piano I suppose I realize how difficult it is for people to teach me cello, so I'm going to try really hard to do the hard stuff.

2010-12-26T22:09:00.001+08:00

This is so cute it's almost unbearable.

http://www.mikeadair.com/David%27sNewSnail.swf

2010-12-26T00:42:00.002+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

I even colored it in true Christmas fashion.

My Reddit package didn't arrive today :(

Well, as my mom says, it's not Christmas day, it's Christmas week. So I still have a week for my package. I *can't* wait! :D

But you know what's better than not receiving a Christmas package? Actually getting something you want on Christmas! Yay!

My dad got me a 640GB Ovation portable hard disk drive. AAAAHHHHHHH!! I'm so happy! I've been going to Challenger like every week to check on the price and see if it falls but my dad got it for me so I guess that's that.

My brother got the game Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit which, apparently, is the game he always wanted.

Things observed from watching Heroes

2010-12-26T00:08:00.005+08:00

You have to watch Heroes to understand what I'm saying.

1. Everyone on Heroes is hot. Even the villain. Even the sidekicks.

Well, I suppose everyone on TV shows are hot, but that is besides the point. And I can't believe it took me one season for me to notice that.

2. Nathan Petrelli's face is long.

Looooong.

3. Why do all the heroes stick to this self righteous, upright moral code? Why don't they just use their abilities to make their lives easier?

4. Isn't Sylar's/Gabriel Gray's ability, to understand things intricately/understand what makes people tick, a power in itself?

5. Why is it that all abilities are useful? Why aren't there any useless abilities, like, I don't know, knowing the exact amount of liquid in someone's body?

6. How does Sylar control what abilities he uses?

7. If Hiro can travel back in time, why can't he just kill everyone in the Company and save everyone all the trouble of hiding?

8. If Candice (shapeshifter) was really just a fat white girl when she was knocked out by Sylar in Season 2, how come she was a skinny model-like latina in Season 1 when she was knocked out by Niki Sanders?

9. In Season 1 all Claire wanted to be was a normal girl. In Season 3 she changed her mind because of all the pain Sylar caused her, and wanted revenge against all the powerful people. If she really wanted revenge, why didn't she support Nathan Petrelli's plan to contain powerful people?

10. And speaking of Nathan's plan, why would he want to round up powerful people, especially since one of said powerful people is... himself?

11. In Season 3 Sylar killed Arthur Petrelli. Before he died, Arthur Petrelli absorbed Peter Petrelli's abilities, and since Sylar is so fascinated with collecting abilities, why didn't he absorb Arthur's abilities for himself?
The bonus is that Peter's ability also includes absorbing other peoples' abilities when he's around them, effectively making Peter's ability the most desirable of all, since it's a one size fits all wild card.

12. Why doesn't Maury Parkman just control Arthur Petrelli? Why does he follow all of Arthur's orders, even when Arthur is clearly paralysed and will kill him one day if Maury helps him?

I clearly spend too much time watching Heroes gah.

2010-12-25T22:42:00.001+08:00

I wonder how much time employees have at Google.

2010-12-25T00:40:00.002+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

...and a happy new year.

Just remember Jesus is the reason for the season.

2010-12-24T20:25:00.002+08:00

I went shopping for my prom dress today. While I did eventually get my dress and shoes and stuff, it taught me some very, very valuable lessons:

Always choose the biggest dress.
Always choose the biggest shoe size.
Never go shopping with your family: your mom will have a running commentary on everything, your dad will try to go to Starbucks, and your brother will be whining about the amount of time you've already spent there.
It sucks not being able to wear the dress/shoe you want because there is no size.
Some customers are crazy.

Yup.

2010-12-24T01:02:00.001+08:00

Click to enlarge.

2010-12-24T00:33:00.003+08:00

I had CO practice today.

It was super weird.

For one, the conductor decided that today of all days was the perfect day to do sectionals. I think that should have been when they gave out the new song piece. I was freaking out then because I had to sight read the song but it turned out okay in the end.

And then there was the issue of people who were there. Or, the people who weren't. There were only two people in the Cello/Bass section.

Also, my left index finger was healing nicely from the bleach thing but was still kinda tender. And then I had to practice sliding it down the A string which hurt so much, it felt like it was cutting into my skin.

The last time that happened the flesh on either side of the cut dried up and cracked when I went to Japan and started bleeding whenever I pushed the suitcases. There was one instance where I didn't notice it was bleeding and then I got blood all over my camera.

Bloody camera.

So anyway practice was kind of boring and also kind of torturous because I couldn't play it properly because of my finger sliding issues. Also, Mervyn insisted that I couldn't just stretch my hand as a substitution for sliding.

WHY. :(

The good things were that 1) the four hours flew by quickly enough; 2) my finger didn't end up cut, just dirty from the sliding; 3) it was the last CO practice of the year yay! Plus WOW next Jan means I can't go for practice.

I don't know if more people in Cello/Bass next year will be a good thing. I kind of liked having a small group. I realized I am OK with small groups with at most three people. The current group size is 5, not that far off.

On the other hand Cello/Bass needs more people.

Darn.

2010-12-24T00:23:00.002+08:00

Three weird things happened:

My brother walked out of the kitchen with a Milo packet under his armpit and a look that said "This? Oh, I'm just training my armpit muscles."
My dad offered to give me money to go shopping for clothing. My dad is the kind of person that forgets to give me my allowance until Thursday, when I remind him.
I have been super wide awake for the past three days. If this were a normal school week I'd be jumping for joy at the extra energy. But it's been a torture. I can't sleep quickly; my body feels tired and my eyes feel strained but I can't fall asleep. I used to be able to sleep 14 hours and still feel sleepy for the other 10.
I have freakishly big and soft hands.

On a side note, I hope #3 happens during school days next year. I think I'd need it. Especially during Bio lectures. Because I've caught myself falling asleep during Bio lessons in the first ten minutes.

My SecretSanta gift hasn't arrived yet. It's 24th December already.

I really hope it arrives by tomorrow.

2010-12-24T00:19:00.004+08:00

Had Tau meeting yesterday with Vaishu and Melina. Meetings with them are always super fun. One, we never end up doing much actual work. Two, Vaishu and Melina are so fun to be around.

We spent like two hours talking about things unrelated to the project. The last project meeting we sat at the canteen from 1.30 to 4.30 and drew up a list of people and their subject combis.

Also I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who feels that way about the programme :)

It turns out Ms Tan told Vaishu something that she didn't tell me when she wanted to meet up with us. I wonder why.
What Ms Tan told me:

If I cannot cope I have to tell her.
She knows I am an earnest student (her words (!) ).
She knows people who took the Physics path that are studying cognitive science. (This was before I decided to take Bio.
I looked really scared. (I wasn't scared. Really. No, really!)

What Ms Tan told Vaishu:

She was going to monitor every test result.

I wonder if she is actually going to monitor test results.

I still can't believe Vaishu wants to join wushu. O.O I also cannot believe that the girls in OBSabah slept with just their bras and pants. Isn't that like super awkward? Seriously?

2010-12-21T22:39:00.007+08:00

I feel like I don't deserve anything I've achieved so far.

1. TAU: I guess those 10 marks in TA1 Physics promos which caused me to fufil the criteria, and when I couldn't guess it this year, Ms Tan didn't kick me out 'cause I failed the criteria. Also, I stuttered incessantly was trembling for the whole interview.

2. Mazarin: They accepted ALL TA applicants. Even those not in the top 10%, ie. me.

3. CO: Accepts non music background students. And I'm in SYF not because I am qualified, but because there are too little people playing cello. Plus, I've been in CO for two years and I've only performed once.

4. TA: I flopped the experiment, muttered throughout the interview, wrote garbage on the English admissions essay and left like 5 questions blank on the Math one.

5. PSLE: Yes, I'm even going to talk about PSLE. I read books all day, didn't really pay attention in class, and studied only near exams, but I still passed everything. Amazingly.

2010-12-20T18:56:00.000+08:00

Your item left the United States from FOREIGN CENTERJERSEY CITY NJ 099 at 12:10 pm on December 17, 2010. Information, if available, is updated periodically throughout the day. Please check again later.

Sadface. I really hope it arrives by Christmas.

Warm Aircon: Or, I'm really bored. Really.

2010-12-20T18:25:00.004+08:00

123 Fake Road
Singapore 987654

Dear Imaginary Friend,
Hi! How have you been? I've been busy recently so I could only write a letter at this time. My purpose of writing this letter today is not to tell you something useful, but because I am really bored and have nothing to do.

Okay, now that the greeting and purpose of letter has been written, I can probably go on to the main text. I have no idea what the actual purpose of the letter is supposed to be, so I'll make up my own: Warm Aircon.

Or more specifically, to talk about People Who Like Really Cold Aircon and Why I Like Warm Aircon.

Most people I asked like cold aircon. Which makes sense. The purpose of aircon is to make the air around you cooler, right? Except that I don't really like cool aircon. First, it makes me really uncomfortable, like prickling heat, only the opposite, and secondly, it makes my nose cold and then I'll have a sneezing fit the next day. Also, why turn the aircon up if you're just going to snuggle in a comforter again?

I prefer warm aircon. Or lukewarm aircon, whichever way you want to call it. Anyway, the perfect warm aircon temperature is when it's cold enough to stop you from sweating, but the temperature is warm enough for you to think that maybe you're outside. Make sense? Maybe not. But it does to me.

I can't think of any more drivel to drag this letter on. The word count at the bottom left corner of Microsoft Word tells me that, including this complete sentence, I’ve bullshitted 277 words. Well, I guess it’s time to go. I look forward to your next imaginary letter. Not really.
Wishing you
A Healthy Body

From
Fiction McFake
Today's date

2010-12-17T10:52:00.001+08:00

This is kind of creepy.

But hey, Merry Christmas!

2010-12-16T12:09:00.005+08:00

My SecretSanta just shipped my gift! I'm so excited I'm refreshing the tracking updates page every two seconds :D

I got my Santee a $20 TS gift certificate.
1. It's affordable (for me).
2. It can fit in an envelope.
3. Who doesn't like a drama?
It's not for me, though. TS doesn't sell American dramas/movies.

Except... I feel kind of bad, because my Santa seems so dedicated and I seem so deadbeat. Ah well.

2010-12-15T01:55:00.001+08:00

Should I finish up my option form or go sleep now? It's a really hard decision...

2010-12-08T00:28:00.002+08:00

AHHHH Natalie Tran was in Singapore last week and I didn't know!

>:(

She's a Youtube vlogger who's currently trying to travel around the world.

She also wrote a blog post about Singapore:

The one thing I was most excited about though was breakfast with the orangutans at Singapore Zoo. When they were like 'Hey Natalie, would you like to have breakfast with an orangutan?' I checked my bucket list and confirmed I would. Also, I hadn't had a date in ages.

The only problem was that when I got there, the bastard had invited about 40 other people to breakfast as well so it wasn't a very intimate affair. In fact, to be frank, it was just awkward. If you think eating in front of other people as they watch you is horrible, try eating in front of orangutans who have been forced to sit on a log and watch you eat. It's exactly as I just described it, an awkward affair.

2010-12-07T23:58:00.004+08:00

♫ I'm going to Japan tomorrow! ♫

Why Japan is awesome:
1. Food | Every meal, there are all these little plates with one or two items on it on your table (you sit on your own) and then there's a wok where you cook the items yourself.
2. JR Tower | Oh the shopping. ♥ Plus, it has five (or more?) huge levels of electronics stuff.
3. Butt washing toilets | There's a panel of buttons. One is for music, one is for the flushing sound (but no actual flushage occurs) (why would they invent something like that?! WHY?!), and one is for butt washing.
It's called "bidet". I pressed it, and a jet of water (source unknown) sprayed out. Of course, I wasn't sitting on the toilet.
4. Chocolate Factory | An actual factory with a shop that sells yummy white chocolate biscuits.

Why Japan is not so awesome:
1. The Cold. | I'm not kidding on this one. Last year my dad took a photo with my mom + bro + me in it, and it was so cold we couldn't even take off our face masks for three seconds for the photo. That photo shows three ninjas posing in front of a frozen waterfall.
2. 言葉の障壁 | Exactly. Everyone will be saying garbled sounds. The signs and TV will be filled with garbled symbols I don't understand. And when talking to locals, I will suddenly become an expert in sign language. (Or appear to be.)
3. Scenery | Okay, scenery can be soothing. But it can also be very, very boring after the first two days.

Reddit's SecretSanta

2010-12-05T18:16:00.002+08:00

Reddit has its annual SecretSanta gift exchange: you sign up, wait for the system to match you up with another user, and then you give that user your gift.

I already mailed my gift to my Santee (?) and was kind of sad that my Santa hadn't sent me my gift yet (all gifts were to be mailed by 6 Dec, 2010).

:(

And then my Santa sent me a pm through Reddit! AHHHHH!

I can't wait for my present to come :)

2010-12-03T21:52:00.003+08:00

Watched Rapunzel today with Ngieng and Joey!

Anyway, there's this child abuse campaign (change your profile pic to childhood memories) going on on facebook, and just like the breast cancer awareness campaign ("I like it on the ______") it does absolutely nothing to help the people who are suffering from it.

"Really want to prevent child abuse? Help out your friends and family that have kids and are stressed out, volunteer with a youth group, volunteer at a non-profit that works with families, become a foster parent, or develop an after school program. But don't change your goddamn profile picture and think you've done anything to prevent child abuse. Thanks for nothing.
- thesheba

This probably only makes people feel like they've done something even though they've done absolutely nothing to help sufferers.

2010-12-01T23:43:00.002+08:00

I watched Megamind today! I missed the ending so I will be covering my ears around Joey so I don't hear her saying the ending. LALALALA, I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

Good thing my mom chose the 9 pm showtime, because then there were no kids to laugh everytime something silly came up. But then my dad wanted to leave... right when Megamind was running away on his motorbike. I never got to see what happened :(

Relativity

2010-11-30T20:48:00.002+08:00

I've gone over this before:

At first, I decide that having done X, I am satisfied. After I see other people's more successful X, I feel disheartened.

For promos: I felt I did well. But then I realized, I was only slightly above average. By this (pinches fingers together) much.

For what I did in my free time: I thought I was satisfied just reading reddit and watching dramas. But then I see other people going out, doing fun stuff and then I feel kinda sad that I'm "wasting" my life away. What can I say, I like doing things on my own.

For what I may do in the future: Say I get a normal job, and I feel really good and comfortable in it. What if, I bump into someone and see how successful they are, and get sad?

The worst part of it is that since I've decided doing X makes me happy, why should what other people do make me sad? It's so stupid how I use other people as a yardstick for my own life, but I can't help feeling sad when I can't measure up to them.

2010-11-27T20:34:00.002+08:00

I think I'm going to let this blog lie on its own for awhile... Holidays are boring.

Ponies! :)

2010-11-26T12:34:00.009+08:00

Mouseover for original.

Cello/Bass

2010-11-26T11:56:00.002+08:00

Currently there are four people in TJCO's Cello/Bass section, five if you count the new DSA student that joined two days ago. That means next year, there will be 3 J2s (seniors) and 2 J1s (me and the DSA student), if no one else joins.

Out of the 3 seniors, 2 are leaving from 29 Nov onwards for TIP - Temasek Internship Programme - and the other senior is an Indonesian scholar, which means that she will most likely be leaving this week, latest next week.

Do you know what this means?

This means that, for the rest of the holidays, I will have to go to CO practice with the new DSA student. I know this is probably a golden opportunity to get to know the new student better, but it will be awkward to the max. And if you know me, I find everything else awkward enough.

CO practices are closely limited to two kinds - 1, Dazu, where everyone plays in the CO room in front of the conductor; 2, Sectionals, where each section goes off to their own spot in the school and go practice the new piece on their own.

Dazu... and sectionals... with two people in the entire section.

Damn.

2010-11-25T16:43:00.002+08:00

Okay, so I didn't end up watching Megamind today. My mom changed her mind and made us go to Bras Basah with her. But the good news is that I got to go to the Central Lending Library, (or, The Hugeass Library Building Near Suntec).

There are tons of books in that library, even though it's only one level (B1). You know what, if I ever become homeless I'm just going to spend the whole day there. Aircon + comfy couches + so many books = awesome time.

I got 6 books, 2 of which I was planning to print, so I guess that saved me about $10 in paper and binding costs.

♫ I'm going to watch Megamind tomorrow! ♫

2010-11-25T00:37:00.002+08:00

I actually wanted to go by myself, but my mom didn't let me, so I have to go with my brother. At least she's not coming along.

I wanted to shop by myself, but I think I'll have to do that next week.

2010-11-23T22:31:00.002+08:00

I find it very hard to separate a person's actions from who they are. In church, I always hear that God hates the sin, but loves the sinner - God doesn't see a person's actions and the person as one.

Sometimes I keep condemning myself for things I did so long ago, things that don't even matter any more. I can't laugh at myself. I can't separate what I do from who I am. My actions define me. I'm scared to do things I want to do.

So from now on, I'm going to one thing that scares me every day. Or maybe two days. But the thing is I want to stop being scared of doing things. Stop being restricted by myself.

2010-11-23T21:52:00.000+08:00

2010-11-23T10:08:00.003+08:00

I honestly thought there was CO today.

When I saw the practice schedule for the holidays, I thought, "Oh, so it's every Tuesday Wednesday Saturday, 8 to 11.30 or 12".

And then I came to school today, all ready to fix the snapped C string on the cello (NO ONE snaps a C string! It's always the A string!), when I realize that there isn't CO today. I put my CO schedule on my iPod but didn't check it because I thought I knew.

So here I am, typing this post.

On the plus side, I already bound my TA2 notes (finally!!) and am currently considering printing a book at the ZAP, which would be unfortunately expensive but probably more expensive somewhere else.

2010-11-22T15:11:00.000+08:00

Group 6! Whooo!

2010-11-21T17:31:00.003+08:00

The primary school kids look so cute! ◕‿◕

2010-11-21T00:33:00.001+08:00

The worst thing about this fight is that they're not even willing to yell at each other.

They just play mind games and watch on far from the sidelines.

2010-11-21T00:04:00.000+08:00

I am damn hungry now.

*stomach growls*

SLC

2010-11-21T00:01:00.000+08:00

is finally over! (:

2010-11-19T21:20:00.001+08:00

I just considered what happened just now - and if there's anyone who should be sorry it's my parents. I'm not going to feel guilty/upset over something that is not my fault.

To avoid what's going to happen at home over the course of the next few weeks, I'm going to try to go to school as per normal and stay there the whole day. I'm going to:

Slack. (iPod Touch drama marathons, reading reddit discussions, read Dan Ariely's The Upside of Being Irrational which I have been meaning to read for a long time)
Study. (Promos ended 6 weeks ago and since then I've forgot everything. Including differentiation. Plus I have to start studying for next year's syllabus)
Practice cello (I'd rather practice alone in an empty CO room than at home and anyway SYF is next year)
(If possible) Go to printing shops (not our school's. 10cents per B&W page can add up if you print like 200 pages) to print and bind the books I want
Go to Challenger and get the 500GB disk I wanted

That's it. The problem is that I have to leave through the main gate if I want to go opposite to buy something to eat, which can be a hassle because I have to pack everything up, go opposite, then come back and reset everything up again.

The other problem is that my parents are obviously not going to allow this, so I'm going to say I'm studying in school (which is kind of true) for next year's syllabus, and that I can't study at home.

2010-11-19T21:03:00.004+08:00

I confronted my mom about what happened just now and she tried to dismiss my questions.

I threatened to run away from home (totally an empty threat. Come on. Where in the world would I run to?) and she said that the whole confiscating my brother's iPod Touch issue was to test my brother on his honesty.

Yeah, right. There are certain topics you can test about, but there's a very definite boundary and I refuse to believe she didn't know that boundary existed.

I don't believe she's honest with me and that makes me feel like I did something wrong to gain her distrust.

SLC

2010-11-19T20:12:00.003+08:00

was really fun today. I learnt a lot, again, from watching other people from the sidelines: basically how people interact in various situations and how they react to different stimuli.

SLC was made up of a bunch of TJC people, a bunch of sec school people, and a bunch of primary schoolers.

The main thing I remembered about this primary schooler was that when he was talking about his experience of the day, he said,"...the games were extremely fun, especially the..."

And then he paused.

"...actually, I forgot what games there were."

The whole audience erupted in laughter.

2010-11-19T20:07:00.002+08:00

If I could sum my parents' attitudes towards problems in a sentence:

Mom: If you have a problem with someone, the best solution is to never talk with them directly; instead you need to go behind their backs because they will never tell you the truth.
Dad: If you ignore a problem long enough, it will go away.

Obviously they will deny this if asked, but as the cliched saying goes, actions speak louder than words.

>:(

2010-11-19T19:48:00.003+08:00

I feel really pissed at my mom right now.

In the car on the way back, she said "From now on, whenever Jiejie (me) feels sad you guys have to cheer her up. And if she needs anything you all will have to help her. Daddy can do everything from now on."

There's more but I can't remember, basically she made it sound like she was leaving the house and that whatever I relied on her for (emotional stuff) would now have to be carried out by my bro and dad.

Why it made me feel pissed:
1. It's a threat to me - do something about the situation or all these will happen to you. Really unfair when you consider that the whole event is a problem between her and my dad, and is not my or my brother's fault.
2. She doesn't care about me. ("you guys have to do X to help her" = "I'm not going to do X to help her")
3. The point of saying that was also to make my dad feel threatened. If the above points are untrue, (and even if they aren't) she uses me as a tool to make an example of my dad - does she care about how I feel or not?

I suppose I could be wrong, but it is very hard to entirely misinterpret her words.

She also thought I badmouthed her the other day - and she tried to get my brother to tell her what I said, but since I didn't actually say anything, he kept his mouth shut.

He continued keeping his mouth shut even when she confiscated his iPod Touch and didn't allow him to use it until he "told the truth".

I am now proud of my brother.

My dad just sat there and kept his mouth shut.

2010-11-19T01:19:00.001+08:00

I wish I wasn't so easy to read.

A lot of times people can tell what I'm thinking/ how I feel, and then I can't even fathom a guess as to what's going on in their heads.

2010-11-18T21:55:00.002+08:00

I decided:
1) whatever that's going on with my parents is none of my business, which means that I'm not going to ask, and she's NOT supposed to tell.
2) I'm going to take BCME.

I can understand Physics but I can't do the calculations - the end year paper gave lots of marks to definitions and explanations, so it's not fair to say that I would do well in Physics
I am going to work hard at Bio and read it EVERY DAY so I remember it! (:

That is all.

Are you sure it's a happy birthday?

2010-11-18T00:04:00.002+08:00

In short my mom cried the whole day, because my dad doesn't treat her like part of the family. I told her not to tell me so much, which she took wrongly ("You don't care about me! I might as well leave the house").

The actual reason was that it hurt me a lot and made me choose between the both of them and that her telling me really made me feel helpless and I really can't deal with the dramatics right now.

Her response was that I was "already sixteen" and too old to be hurt. Basically, she disregarded my feelings. This coming from someone who thought my disregarding her feelings was good enough reason to leave the house.

I told her to go talk to my dad, and she said her long term plan was to keep throwing tantrums, and NEVER talk about it with him. Because, you know, it is widely known that avoidance is key to all major problems.

And I was looking forward to today...

BCME?

2010-11-16T23:25:00.004+08:00

I realize this is the bazillionth time I'm posting this, but I remembered that there is something fundamentally wrong with why I chose PCME: I chose Physics because it was easier to study for than Biology. Also, the higher grade was an easy excuse. That's a piss poor reason to be choosing something that will affect the next 60 or so years of my life.

Once I thought of what I wanted to study in University (Psychiatry/Neurology/Psychology/Cognitive Sciences) and realized that I couldn't imagine a future in Engineering, I started seriously considering Bio.

There is a high possibility that I'm going to choose BCME.